It is now the end of the first week that I have vowed to change my relationships with others, vowed to stop engaging in gossip and other harmful dialogues. It has been strange, even awkward at times, but when I pray Maghrib prayer I feel so good knowing I have come to my God with a relatively clean heart. I have also noticed that there a few people I can no longer talk with. Removing the negative elements left us with no conversation - and I cannot say how shameful that makes me feel, for I know how much I had contributed in the past. How much of my life has been entangled in this ugly anitlocution? How could I ever believe the occasional good deeds I did ever balanced the terrible legacy I have built, maligning and disparaging other human beings? I have so much to atone for.
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