GED Graduation - My Favorite Night of the Year

Good Evening

My name is Michael Morsches and I am the Dean of Learning Enrichment and College Readiness. I am just now finishing my first year here, and I am as excited to be here with you tonight as I was last year at my first GED graduation!

I would have to say that tonight is my favorite night of the year – we (students, staff, faculty) plod along all year long doing the day to day work that makes tonight possible. Finally, a night to sit back, smile, relax, and take stock of things.

I find myself grateful for four things tonight, forty years after watching my mother earn her GED – those points of gratitude are our country, this school, the families of our students, and our students themselves. I would like to share a few thoughts about each:

Our Country – I am so grateful that we live in the most forgiving educational system in the world. No matter where and when we stumble, we can always come back to our path. The system here forgives us when we falter and it forgives itself when it fails us. It places no limitations on our dreams, and waits patiently for that time when we can exploit it. I am very proud to be part of this process.

This School – In many places in America, GED programs are housed in HS, community centers, or libraries. MV recognizes its role as a true Community College and has made a substantial commitment to our GED students. The dignitaries on the stage behind me are a strong example of this commitment. There are also literally hundreds of staff and faculty here who make this journey possible for our students. I would ask that the staff and faculty in attendance please rise so that we can show you our appreciation, thank you. Once again, I couldn’t be prouder to be in the company of these wonderful professionals.

The Families – That is you J This day would be woefully incomplete without your presence here. Families too are forgiving, we forgive each other and ourselves and keep fighting to stay together and to support one another. Along with my traditional duties as Dean, I have spent the past year teaching GED math courses and I have come to know many students and their friends and families. Sometimes these networks are complex and even a bit crazy, but the love behind it all amazes me. You should be very proud of what you have made possible here tonight. I am.

Our Students – Finally, the reason we are all here tonight. In this day and age, it is amazing to see sixty adults sitting together that have made such major alterations to their lives. Disrupting our routines, reallocating our time, rearranging our commitments are not things we typically like to do as we get older. Our students on stage have done these things and so much more – they have changed their lives for the positive, and most are only just beginning. Tonight is an important watershed in their lives, but just one of many to come. There are future nurses, business owners, engineers, teachers, and leaders sitting before you tonight, taking one night off to celebrate with you. Tomorrow, they will be back chasing those careers and all of us will continue to be here for them. We are so proud of you ! So for the class of 2013 – I wish you all the best, revel in your accomplishment tonight, and sometime later fall asleep knowing you have faithfully purchased your next set of dreams.

Thank you.

 

Forgiveness

It is Ramadan, and I am dutifully reading my Koran while examining my faith.  It has been a wonderul and cathartic process.  I have pondered on so many issues, some theoretically, some practically, some very personally.  I know that this is not just a month's enterprise, I am sure I will continue to read and reflect daily - that die has been cast :) 

One theme that appears over and over again is that of forgiveness.  I have seen how God forgives us, and I have seen how He counsels us to forgive each other.  They are beautiful lessons, and truly the major source of hope for us, for our future. How wonderful would it be to be able to put down something very painful, something you carry that plagues you everyday?  I have thought a lot about forgiveness this month, and I have realized I know so little of the process.

Growing up, forgiveness wasn't an issue, forgetting was the prime directive.  We ignored our injuries and never processed them, never discussed them. Each morning the world began anew, but spun faithfully to the same conclusion.  Perhaps you cannot forgive that which never ceases - you can only forgive the past, and if the past never changes, it is not the past. 

There are different sins and wrongs to forgive I suppose, though I never thought of weighing them to determine the  depth of the prescribed process or the mandatory term required before forgiveness can be granted.  It is also very likely that I have never considered or acknowledged the depth and breadth of my injury, knowing only then how to cleanse it. I do know that I have been hurt, and I spend most of my energy trying to suspend, delay, abate, and distract the reoccurring pain.

There is yet another dimension to forgiveness that I am just now facing: How do you forgive someone who thinks that they have not wronged you?  It's not just an issue of failed closure or disavowed injury, it potentially threatens the nature of reality itself. Having someone deny the legitimacy of your pain, particularly someone you loved, inflicts a newer, harsher version.  These layers of pain then become virtually impossible to manage. Once I have headed down this road, it has been very difficult to find a healthy way back.  

There is another alternative though, perhaps the only alternative for me now.  Perhaps it is time to consider the possibility that there is nothing to forgive, for I have not been wronged. Any pain and suffering I am feeling is of my own accord, my own manufacture.  The longer I ignore this plausible truth, the higher I pile my fantasies of pain until I construct my own mythology of suffering, becoming a comical figure in my own tradgedy.  And all the while, my vain efforts to extract apology and guilt from my "tormentor" might just be the only real injury inflicted, inflicted on someone I once professed to love. I arrive then, at the nadir where I am languishing in self-pity while a friend moves away, more saddened at my demise than my cruel attempts to punish her.

I choose to embrace this new reality, the reality of my own actions and their stubborn consequences. I am no longer the victim of my friends and lovers, nor will I punish them with my own injury. I am not free of the need for forgiveness though, and eventually I will grant it to myself. For all of you that I have hurt through the years, I am sorry, and I promise not to punish you further for my fabricated pain.   

Ramadan Night 21 - The Ninth Entry

O ye who believe!
Truly, among your wives
And your children are (some
That are) enemies to
Yourselves: so beware
Of them! But if ye
Forgive and overlook

And cover up (their faults).

Verily Allah is

Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.

S.64 A.14

Yet another verse espousing forgiveness!  Maybe next year I will count and collect all the incidents in this holy book that references forgiveness - forgiveness by man and forgiveness by God.  The following year my target will be "mercy", the year after that.....you get the idea.  Where on earth (perhaps the wrong place) do these people get their beliefs about hatred and malice flowing from the Koran?

I think there is a remarkable amount of insight in this verse!  God counsels us to deal with family who work against us, not just to remove ourselves from them for His sake. He tells us to forgive them and to work with their sins, not to discard them as we would a false friend or aquaintance.  He knows we are frail humans, and will most likely need more than His word to sustain us, we need the comfort, assurance, and stability of family to successfully navigate this realm.  God is forgiving and merciful. 

Ramadan Night 14

Your Lord knoweth best what is in your hearts:

 If ye do deeds of righteousness,

verily He is Most Forgiving to those who turn to Him

again and again (in true penitence).

S.17 A.25

This verse is very useful for me.  It stresses the connection between thoughts and deeds.  Too often i focus on the proper deeds without making sure I have purified my thoughts.  I was raised a civil environment, so I know which actions are proper and improper by default.  Now I want to work on the thoughts behind these deeds - making sure I don't do something primarily for reward, accolade, or gratitude.  I also want to work on those negative thoughts I do not act on.  To date, I figured I was doing well by not moving such thoughts to action, but now I know I should not be thinking them, not indulging negative ideas or whims. 

By working on my thoughts and actions, I will be more comfortable in asking for forgiveness (true penitence) when I do make mistakes.  In the past, I have felt too ashamed to do so, doubting my worthiness.  I have gone all these years without truly allowing myself the grace of God's forgiveness, I am just now realizing the impact that has had. How could I have ever felt good about my self esteem, without His grace?  Many things are making sense to me these days and I am grateful.  A simple, beautiful verse can do so much when you open your heart.  I need to earn the right to ask for forgiveness, and I will do so. 

Ramadan Night 13

*I received some very bad news today, but I am determined to continue to keep up with my reading and my posts.  I would appreciate any prayers you could send my way :)

Enter ye here in peace and security.

And We shall remove from their hearts

Any lurking sense of injury:

(they will be) brothers

(joyfully) facing each other

On thrones (of dignity).

There no sense of fatigue shall touch them,

nor shall they (ever) be asked to leave.

Tell My servants that I am indeed the Oft-Forgiving,

Most Merciful.

S.15 A.46-49

One translation of this beautiful verse mentions the removal of "jealousy" as well as injury from the heart.  Oh that I could get to this place where my heart is free of injury or jealousy!  I do feel better praying, reading my Koran, meditating - but I am being tested in so many ways right now that my struggle is wearing me down.  Knowing much of my situation is of my own making, doesn't ease the burden.  I have lost a friend that once was a great confidant, and that increases the pain. 

I do find solace here in these words, and I think I will reread this passage over and over the next few weeks.  I need some peace in my heart, and relief from my fatigue.  I am content in the promise of God's forgiveness, but I am also working on mine.  I have a long way to go, but I do want this sense of brotherhood and sisterhood, joyfully facing each other.  I ask for the forgiveness of God, my family, my friends, myself, and my foes.  I just don't have the room to carry any of this in my heart anymore. 

I am stopping myself more and more when a bad thought rises, or when I feel the need to join in a negative conversation.  I am doing a better job, but I have a long way to go.  I realize these actions hurt others in so many ways, and I want to keep coming back to this verse, coming back to a dignified peace.