I am heading back to Jordan after nine months or maybe even a lifetime. It won't be the same place. I won't recognize the soul of Amman this trip, and the heart, if I find it again, won't be in Jabal Amman either. For the first time, the trip will be about my work only, a different kind of love. I am so blessed for this though, so honored the people there value what I do, what we can do together. There will be friends there too, and I look forward to their company. There are three children who will make me smile and laugh, and a young reporter who I can chide almost mercilessly about anything. But there will be a void, and I am anxious to face it, not avoiding it or filling it - just facing it. From there maybe, taking back the rest of the world I gave away, place by place, bit by bit. Amman first, a place I poured my whole soul into, rescuing the residue, reconstituting a city, maybe even my heart.
Your passion brings wonders and deep feelings inside me. I have never felt so connected to a certain place, a cause, a work, or even to my homeland. Where does your passion come from? How can you maintain such a strong and delicate heart at the same time? I had been through many cruel and heartbreaking times, and I try everyday to remain strong, but I really wish I could be like you.. to be honest with you, out of amazement, I sometimes think you're too good to be true, please forgive me for that, and for keeping myself anonymous. Maybe one day we would connect.
ReplyDelete:) You think I am the only one with a strong and delicate heart? Maybe you should stop reading my words and start reading yours :) We will connect, I am sure of it!
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